May 2nd

Today was the third day of the shadow moon.

The last sliver of moon visible before the new moon begins waxing tomorrow.

Quite the opposite of the waxing moon towards fullness (associated with growth, renewal, beneficial), the shadow moon, or dark phase of the moon (the three days immediately preceding the new moon), has traditionally been a time of fear and superstition, a time associated with death and isolation.  The unconscious - the little understood and often feared, aspects of life.

The moon cycles repeatedly from new moon, waxing to full moon, then waning to the dark moon, before moving back into the new moon again, symbolising birth, growth, death and renewal of all life.  The moon mirrors the same fluctuations of increase and decrease that take part in the human body and in our psyche.  Creation and destruction, growth and decay, birth and death, light and dark, conscious and unconscious.

The purpose of the dark phase of any cycle is that of transition between the death of the old and the birth of the new.  The dark time is a time of retreat, of introspection, of healing, and of dreaming the future, of transformation, of preparation.  A time of rest to recuperate, rejuvenate and prepare for the next outburst of creativity and growth.

I felt the impact of the shadow moon this lunar month particularly strong.  I wondered why, then remembered we are still lingering in the energy of Samhain.  I also remembered death has touched me recently.  I also remembered there are still aspects to my life that have yet to be tidied up.  The dark moon goddess energy, crone energy, does not beat around the bush when she is trying to convey her message.  Her wisdom is raw, unsheathed, confronting.  And today I just wasn't in the mood.

Unsurprisingly! *laugh*

So today, I wallowed in self-pity for most of the morning, before divine intervention delivered a conduit for release.  Tears were shed, a smile danced across my face and laughter erupted from my belly.  And then I ventured into the night.  For where else would one really want to be, if not bathing in the darkness when feeling dark?

I balanced out the heaviness of the feminine energy I was feeling, with a dose of playful masculinity and it was just what I needed.  Oh, that and chocolate.

I am still learning to anticipate the waves.  To embrace and appreciate the importance of waning energy, rather than just reveling in waxing energy and becoming frustrated when the call for quiet roars to me.  To slow down when the darkness approaches.  To listen to the wisdom of the dark aspect of our triple goddess, rather than just dismiss her message as that of a crazy old hag who doesn't know a thing about anything to do with me.

Today, I am grateful for (almost missed!) opportunities to acknowledge the need for introspection - when it calls, not just when I decide it's convenient.  And to open myself up to listen, even when I'm arrogant enough to think there's nothing I need to do right now...

This one, just because.  I love the light, I love the structure.